Hmmmm… Religious organizations can be exempt from laws passed by the government. Well, my God sent me a magical, invisible podcast telling me that it is my divine mission to commit insider trading. Also, I don’t believe in dentistry, so no one that I employ will have dental coverage. Seems legit. Boom. Religious fanatic logic.

As I write this, tears flow steadily down my cheeks. It’s mothers’ day. I won’t see my mom. I’ve been high for the entire week. This is my lowest point so far this year. I broke up with another girlfriend, but that is just a minor upset. I don’t really know how to express what I’m feeling with words. I’ve learned that there are a lot more things that you can feel than there are things you can express with words. I want to die, but my suicide threshold is much higher than it used to be. If this were last year, I would be quite dead at the moment. I might fail high school in the final weeks of senior year. That would mean that I would forfeit a $50,000 scholarship and not be able to go to college.  Here’s a scary thought. The concept of nothing, a difficult one to grasp, is a beautiful and comforting one. What’s worse, it seems welcoming. Death, an inevitable occurrence, albeit one that could occur today or in 70 years (an infinitesimally small amount of time on the universal scale), calls to me, offering peace and relief. Relief for me, peace for me and my family. My best friend, my girlfriend, my partner, is gone. Actually, worse than gone. She hates me. She’ll do her best to destroy me. To my face, she’ll act like she has never seen me before. Behind my back, she’ll tear my flesh from my bones; spread rumors, tell stories, make jokes, call me fat, tell people I have a small dick, call me an addict. My family is tired of my shit. Tired of drugs. Tired of apathy. Tired of laziness on a grand scale. They’re exhausted. I love them all more than they’ll ever know, and yet, it’s mothers’ day, and I’m in the dark, in my room, typing, getting ready to scour my final remaining piece for the scraps of something to get me high. I feel like I’m getting close to the end of the tragedy of my life.

My Life:

it is awesome. muhuhahahahahaha